Some of the conventional models of parenting include:
Rules of Traffic Model – an instructional approach to upbringing. Parents explain to their children how to behave, assuming that they taught the rules of behavior as they did the rules of traffic. What you try to teach a child doesn’t necessarily mean it will get through to them. For example, a teenager was told "a thousand times" that stealing was wrong yet the teen continued to do so. The problem of parenting, in this case, is not that they tried to teach him/her the right thing, but that they considered parenting as a single, narrow minded method of parenting, without fulfilling the range of parental duties.
Fine Gardening Model – a model in which parents believe that children have positive and negative qualities, the latter of which parents should "weed out" or "prune" into an appropriate shape. The problem in this parenting method is that parents fight with the faults of their child rather than appreciate their current achievements and/or capabilities; a method which may continue through their whole life without success.
Of these two models, Simon Soloveychik, author of Parenting For Everyone, states:
The models “rules of traffic” and “fine gardening” are especially dangerous because we, following our best motives, constantly quarrel with our children, destroy relationships, and all our parental work becomes a hopeless effort. Moreover, we don’t understand why this has happened. – Simon Soloveychik
Reward and Punishment – "RaP" is a model of parenting based on logic: for a good action - a reward/praise and for a bad action - a punishment/scolding/reprimand. To teach a child by this logic is relatively easy and can even be effective, especially if it is done consistently. It is because it forms a sense of justice in a child's mind that it works. But, simultaneously, it imparts the child's universal image of the reward and punishment and when real life doesn't prove to be just it undermines the child's faith in justice, according to Soloveychik. He writes "It is dangerous for the future of children. It may happen that a man, grown up by this model, facing the first serious failure or first trouble, would lift his arms and ask, 'Why me?'"
Help with Parenting
Let’s face it. Parenting is just about the most difficult job you can have. In this busy world, parents often find themselves living in a state of chaos, using inconsistent discipline techniques and trying to manage their teen’s behavior amidst an otherwise overwhelming schedule. Your teen’s behavior often gets worse in response to such chaos. I can help bring back more structure and order to your household, while increasing the level of your authority with your children. I can teach you basic behavior modification skills, which will increase the behaviors you, do want; while extinguishing the behaviors you don’t want. Best of all, my positive parenting techniques help to improve your relationship with your child, and help YOU to get more joy out of parenting.
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